Most all folks understand universal language

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The most pressing issue on the minds and hearts of many folks for the next few days — other than wondering about how much longer the virus is going to be around and will we get some snow this winter — is the upcoming Valentine’s Day.

And the question of, “What do I get my Sweet Patootie for the occasion?”

Years ago Johnny Cash told us in song that love is “a burning thing and it makes a fiery ring.” That’s probably true; many of us can attest to that since some time or another we’ve fallen into that fiery ring, sometimes more than once.

But love is also a funny thing. Not funny “ha ha,” but funny in how it happens and works ... or doesn’t.

Long ago when dinosaurs roamed the earth, my tender young mind was exposed to learning, as a part of my school career, the French language.

Since then I have learned that both those languages have some common ancestors and that much of our English-speak comes from those tongues, and others, known as “romance languages.” And maybe it’s appropriate that that’s the word used to describe the vocabulary we use when speaking of certain things such as love.

But I’ve also come to know that when it comes to certain words and an understanding of what they all mean, sometimes my English words fall short in that area.

Take the word “love,” for instance; not the emotion or action but the word. In English we have only that one word to convey all kinds of feelings ... from I “love” pizza to I “love” my dog to I “love” my family and so on. They all have different meanings (at least they’d better). It could be rough on the home front if the feeling I have for cheeseburgers is the same one I have in mind when speaking of, to, or about, my better half.

So in that regard the Greek folks have it over us. Some seminary studies years back and subsequent reading since then have told me that the word we translate “love” when we read The Book often has various meanings. There is, for instance, the Greek word “eros,” which we translate as “love” sometimes. It is the mother of our word “erotic” and since this is a family publication, I feel it prudent not to go any further with an explanation of what that word means.

I will say it has something to do with how the sparks fly when chemistry is at work between Bubba and Clementine. At this stage if you’re not familiar with what I mean and need more information, ask your mother.

Then there are such words for love as “philia,” meaning a kind of “brotherly” love and is found in the name of that city in Pennsylvania where the Eagles and Phillies play that’s known as “the city of brotherly love.”

There are other words and uses in other languages, of course, and all those have a place. But there’s also the one we don’t use much in our language and culture except in and around church that may be the most complete definition and meaning of the word.

In English, we spell it “agape” and pronounce it “ah-ga-pay” and not “a-gape.” It’s the best way we mortals have to talk about God’s love for humanity and perhaps our most common use of it has to do with how we treat other folks and whether we keep score in the game of life.

That word sort of has the same thing going for it that I encountered one day when the oldest of our two 40-somethings who used to be teenagers one day asked me — out of the clear blue, mind you — this question: “Could I ever do anything that would make you stop loving me?”

After pondering on that for what seemed a couple of hours, I said to her, “Uhhh ... what have you got in mind?”

The reality was she had nothing in mind; what she was doing was asking me another question, namely, “Is your love for me conditional?” The answer to that, of course, is “no” and that’s sort of what agape means.

This Valentine’s Day, as you shop for your Sweet Patootie, try to include some of all those types of love where appropriate. But mostly remember a few things: 1) “love” doesn’t keep score; 2) “love” isn’t love until you give it away; and 3) “love” means if you want good things for yourself, then you’re supposed to want good things for other folks, too.

And it’s also OK if you want to eat some of the chocolate this year.

Bob Wachs is a native of Chatham County and retired long-time managing editor of the Chatham News/Chatham Record, having written a weekly column for more than 30 years. During most of his time with the newspapers, he was also a bi-vocational pastor and today serves Bear Creek Baptist Church for the second time as pastor.